Mother's Day 2010
I had an amazing Mother's Day weekend. First, on Saturday, I had the privilege of attending a "Birthmother's Day Brunch" at the agency. It was wonderful to sit amongst my fellow Birthmother sisters as we celebrated our strength and our children. The first year we had our brunch, we really focused on celebrating our children whom we love so much. But this year, the focus was on us and our strength of a warrior that we had. It is amazing the love and connection that I feel to these women in that room. I didn't really know any of them, but you can sense the deep love and understanding that we have for one another.
There are always many tears shed as we heard the many different stories. As I sat there and listened, I felt incredibly blessed in my life. I kept thinking, "why does my story seem so much easier?" "Why is there not one ounce of my body that is still struggling with my decision to place?" Now, when I say "easier" I don't mean that anything about giving my child to someone else was in anyway easy. It wasn't. It was the hardest thing that I have ever done. But, I heard stories of women who are still struggling with their decision 6-12 years later! I heard stories of women who got pregnant again and again and women who struggled with addiction problems. As I contemplated these thoughts, I could feel the Spirit whisper to me that it was because I decided to fully devote my life to my Heavenly Father. What He wanted for me, I did. How can one regret doing the things that Heavenly Father wants you to do? I am truly grateful for the gift of Faith that I have been given. I have seen that gift very evident in my life. I don't mean to brag by any means, but I truly, truly am grateful for that gift that I know that I have been given. It really has helped in my life just to know that if I do the things that my Heavenly Father asks of me, then I will be blessed. Not that things will be easy, but just that I will be blessed in the end. He has kept that promise and has blessed me immensely.
One of those blessings has been the opportunity to be a Mother to my two beautiful children. I love celebrating Mother's Day. I kind of "milk it", as Jerrod would say. And he is dang right. I do "milk it." It is Mother's Day and I deserve to be celebrated!! From the time that I placed Alex, to the time I held Kennedi in my arms, there was nothing more that I desired than to be a Mother. Now, I have the privilege of having Kennedi and Kaden, and soon to be another one. It is an incredibly overwhelming job where I am constantly wondering if I am doing the right things. I hope that I am. I love my children more than I can describe.
So, Sunday morning, I woke up to get ready for church. Jerrod came downstairs to "make" breakfast. He was so dang cute. He put on one of my aprons, threw around some flour on him and the counter, and pulled out some "homemade" cinnamon rolls. I loved it. They were delicious. Thanks honey!
Then, Jerrod, Jaela, and the kids had gifts for me. Jerrod and the kids got me a cute new purse that I wanted. And, Jaela got me some really good root lifter.
I was SO excited to go to church because I knew that the Primary kids would be singing. Of course, Kennedi freaked out and wouldn't get up there to sing to me. The horrible mother in me was upset that she wouldn't get up. I had just been waiting for that day for so long and she wouldn't do it. I think that she could tell that I was upset and when they were done singing because she grabbed my face, turned it towards her and said, "Mom...I will sing to you when I get home!" When she said that, I just started laughing so hard and decided that she had been forgiven.
After church, we had a little barbeque outside. The sun was shining and it was SO beautiful outside. It was like Heavenly Father was telling all of us Mother's how much He loves us.
After lunch, I laid down to take an un-interrupted nap. It was wonderful. That is really all I wanted for Mother's Day. It was a great Mother's Day. I truly was spoiled.
There are always many tears shed as we heard the many different stories. As I sat there and listened, I felt incredibly blessed in my life. I kept thinking, "why does my story seem so much easier?" "Why is there not one ounce of my body that is still struggling with my decision to place?" Now, when I say "easier" I don't mean that anything about giving my child to someone else was in anyway easy. It wasn't. It was the hardest thing that I have ever done. But, I heard stories of women who are still struggling with their decision 6-12 years later! I heard stories of women who got pregnant again and again and women who struggled with addiction problems. As I contemplated these thoughts, I could feel the Spirit whisper to me that it was because I decided to fully devote my life to my Heavenly Father. What He wanted for me, I did. How can one regret doing the things that Heavenly Father wants you to do? I am truly grateful for the gift of Faith that I have been given. I have seen that gift very evident in my life. I don't mean to brag by any means, but I truly, truly am grateful for that gift that I know that I have been given. It really has helped in my life just to know that if I do the things that my Heavenly Father asks of me, then I will be blessed. Not that things will be easy, but just that I will be blessed in the end. He has kept that promise and has blessed me immensely.
One of those blessings has been the opportunity to be a Mother to my two beautiful children. I love celebrating Mother's Day. I kind of "milk it", as Jerrod would say. And he is dang right. I do "milk it." It is Mother's Day and I deserve to be celebrated!! From the time that I placed Alex, to the time I held Kennedi in my arms, there was nothing more that I desired than to be a Mother. Now, I have the privilege of having Kennedi and Kaden, and soon to be another one. It is an incredibly overwhelming job where I am constantly wondering if I am doing the right things. I hope that I am. I love my children more than I can describe.
So, Sunday morning, I woke up to get ready for church. Jerrod came downstairs to "make" breakfast. He was so dang cute. He put on one of my aprons, threw around some flour on him and the counter, and pulled out some "homemade" cinnamon rolls. I loved it. They were delicious. Thanks honey!
Then, Jerrod, Jaela, and the kids had gifts for me. Jerrod and the kids got me a cute new purse that I wanted. And, Jaela got me some really good root lifter.
I was SO excited to go to church because I knew that the Primary kids would be singing. Of course, Kennedi freaked out and wouldn't get up there to sing to me. The horrible mother in me was upset that she wouldn't get up. I had just been waiting for that day for so long and she wouldn't do it. I think that she could tell that I was upset and when they were done singing because she grabbed my face, turned it towards her and said, "Mom...I will sing to you when I get home!" When she said that, I just started laughing so hard and decided that she had been forgiven.
After church, we had a little barbeque outside. The sun was shining and it was SO beautiful outside. It was like Heavenly Father was telling all of us Mother's how much He loves us.
After lunch, I laid down to take an un-interrupted nap. It was wonderful. That is really all I wanted for Mother's Day. It was a great Mother's Day. I truly was spoiled.
I am so blessed to be able to be a Mother.
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