Just Kidding Mom!!! --Love Bean

So, apparently our little Bean wants to be inside me as long as possible.  I feel as though I may be pregnant forever.  I say this because I KNOW that this baby has been waiting to come to our family for a VERY long time.  I have been feeling this very strongly ever since October or so.  I kept sending my thoughts "out there" to him/her to let him/her know that I understood that he/she wanted to come, but that I wasn't quite ready yet.  So, in December, we found out that I was pregnant, but within in days, we lost that pregnancy.  We don't know why, but I know that something wasn't right or developing properly and it was my body's natural way of taking care of it.  When I did find out that time that I was pregnant, we got really excited that it was finally time for baby Brower #3.  When I lost that one, I still felt very strongly that there was a little spirit still waiting to come to our family.  I had a regular "cycle" in the month of January which started on the 22nd.  Then, nothing in February, so we were hopeful that I was pregnant again.  After 2 weeks of no cycle, and 2 negative tests, I started to worry that I was all messed up from working out so much.  Nothing explained me being late with two negative tests.  I finally decided to take another one and it turned out POSITIVE!!  We were pretty excited.  So, naturally, we placed my tentative due date to October 29th, according to my last menstrual cycle.  And, TENTATIVE is the key word here.  When I went in to my doctor 1 1/2 weeks ago, I figured that I was about 10 weeks.  When he did an ultrasound with the little machine they had there at the office, he said that I was more like 8 weeks and 2 days.  I was pretty shocked that I was a whole 2 weeks later than what we thought I was.  He set up an ultrasound at a radiology place to get a more accurate due date.

This last Monday, we went in to the radiologist and that ultrasound said that I was only 8 weeks and 5 days!!!  Craziness!!  So, today I am 9 weeks and 1 day, with a due date of November 17th.

 I hear ya little Bean, I made you wait a little longer, so now you are getting me back and making us wait a little longer for your arrival.  It was a funny trick you played on me, but I guess you win.  Needless to say, we are so excited for you and your big sister is determined that you are a girl.  We will just have to wait and see if she is right.

I am so grateful for the opportunity that I have to feel the wonderful miracle of being pregnant.  It is amazing.  On Monday we saw our little Bean jumping around with a very strong heart beat.  It really is a miraculous thing to witness something so tiny but still so very alive inside of me.  I don't know how anyone could think otherwise.  This pregnancy will probably seem very long, but I am going to enjoy my moments with Kennedi and Kaden as much as possible.  The Summer will fly by and before I know it, he/she will be here.  And then I will have THREE!!  I don't know how I am going to do it, but I do know that it is just how it is supposed to be.  This little spirit has let me know that very clearly that he/she wants to be a part of our family, and we will welcome him/her with open arms.  I love that baby already. And that is really amazing.